Where can we start to explain God's Love, His grace and His goodness? I guess we can't really explain it in words; it is something you just experience and keep in your heart. As with this testimony, I will never be able to explain in words how great God really is and what He really means to me, and I believe to all who have come to know Him as Savior – and to everyone who wants to get to know Him.
If you haven't read my first testimony as mentioned above, I would like to ask you to please read it first as this 2nd testimony will kind of make more sense to you as they are in a way linked to each other.
As you would have noticed in my first testimony that I have lost my left leg (Above the knee) due to infection, as well as my right hip was removed too – this was back in 2005. Ever since then I have been clamped to a wheelchair, and I still am today, but I believe not for very much longer. Doctors told me that I would never walk again – but with Jesus nothing is impossible!!
After I lost my left leg and my right hip was removed (girdle stone) in 2005, I always believed that I will walk again. I believe that if you really want to do something – you can – nothing is impossible, and with Jesus by your side, even the impossible is possible. I have to be honest and say that there were times when I started doubting because nothing worked out as I hoped. I often heard remarks like: "You have to accept the fact that you won't be able to walk again", "you don't have to proof anything etc." But to me it wasn't about proving anything, and I have accepted the fact that I am in a wheelchair long ago. To me it was about something that laid in my heart – like a dream and I believed in that dream, even though at times I wanted to give up on this dream – and I thank God that He kept this dream alive in my heart through all the tribulations.
Sometimes things don't work out as we have hoped, or they don't happen the way we have planned, and that sometimes puts us down for a while, hurts us, breaks us and even makes us want to give up. It even tends us to lose faith, lose sight, asking all the ‟why" and ‟when" and ‟how" questions etc... we start questioning God and His Love. But I can assure you that God knows best – He knows what is best for your life. He will never disappoint you! He loves you just the way you are – even with your mistakes. His timing is always perfect. He has greater plans for you than you can imagine, He has a better way than the way you have hoped or planned for. His Word says in Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope, and in Isaiah 55:8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD.
I had one thing in mind for me to walk again – I wanted a knee replacement in my right knee and get a prosthetic left leg. Let me go back a little – I have Rheumatoid Arthritis in all my joints as mentioned in my 1st testimony. Due to the fact that I have been sitting in a wheelchair for the past almost 7 years (since early 2004), and not being able to walk, my right healthy knee became stiff – it locked completely due to not moving around because of the Arthritis. So, I wanted to have a knee replacement – that was my idea for more than 5 years – I had this one thing in mind, and it was the only way. A knee replacement and a prosthetic leg and I will be able to walk again. Or at least, that is what I thought – but God had another idea.
For more than 5 years, nothing worked out the way I wanted it to, or as I hoped – every time I reached a dead-end, nothing happening and nothing progressing. Those were the times when sometimes I slowly lost sight, lost faith, asked all the ‟why", ‟when" and ‟how" questions – on my way of giving up on my hopes and dreams, questioning God and His Love etc. We often do this when things doesn't work out our way or in our timing. Trust me when I say: "God knows best – His timing is perfect – He has greater plans for you!"